I tidy the house.

The LTLP and Toddler have been away for a few days in order to allow me to both catch up with some sleep and to get some work done. Clearly I have not done either of these things, having mainly been either playing snooker at my exclusive Snooker Club, watching the rugby at the Village Pub, or helping my friend Hetti with her Holiday Cottage Norfolk website.

There is a single portion left from yesterday’s continuing-economic-crisis meal. This time I had scraped all the mouldering stuff from the back of the fridge into a large pot, added some sausages and a packet sauce mix left over from the days when I used packet sauce mixes (best before date: March 2005, which I guess dates it two or three years earlier).

I slop the leftovers into a carton and ponder a bit before taking a felt-tip pen, scribbling ‘Casserole of Last Resort’ on the lid and chucking the whole thing in the freezer.

Truth be told, I have found the last few days on my own to be immensely fun and relaxing. I worry that this makes me a Bad Person (even more so than murdering those children). But sometimes a man needs a bit of a break from responsibilities. It has been good to be master of my own life for three days at least. It has recharged me; made me strong again.

Obviously now I need to tidy up, otherwise she will shout at me.